I have sort of gotten away from posting my feelings and day to day trials. I am so worried about making others feel down that I dont' want to post the sadness. AND I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, I just need to get it out sometimes. When someone tells me they don't know what to say, that is enough. Just to know that I have people that will let me lean on them when I need too. I have met parents on this journey that are far down the road and they say it does not go away, I will always grieve and it will never be fair. Some of them have lost siblings or spouses and parents, and they say there is no grief like that of losing a child and that I don't have to feel guilty about having bad days.

I still have times that I bawl outloud because I miss the girls. Things still catch me off guard and make me catch my breath. One of those is this new song. The first time we heard it was when we were going to the cemetary, as we entered the gate this song came on the radio, we both just sat there not moving. What timing. (Sissy's Song) I have it here on the blog.

I do know how much I have to be thankful for, but some days are just too much.
I love you girls.